Friday, August 29, 2008

Am I confused or could it be April Fool's Day!

Wake me up someone, please, I think I am dreaming!!! My 21 year old son that is living at Fort Bragg just got married at the Justice of Peace today. O.k. are you all as confused as I am. I am still in shock and I can't quit figure the whole thing out myself. He just turned 21 years old this month. As a mother you always hope that you will get to see your kids get married in a big church with all your friends and family. My hubby is from a family of 8 brothers and sisters. So just his family alone would make for a great time at a wedding. I always say the more the merrier. Brendan is the type of kid that does what he wants. He has always been that way. Even when he was a little guy. We use to butt heads quit a bit. But never the less, I loved him so and was always there for him. He has been dating this girl for about a year. I just got the chance to meet her a few months ago. I remember telling Brendan how much I liked her. She is truly a sweet girl. I couldn't pick a better daughter-in-law if I tried. I know she will make a good wife and a wonderful mother. I am just a little sad that I didn't get a chance to be by their side when the big event happened today. I am still just bewildered by the whole thing. But that is Brendan. Always looking for the shock factor in everything. I will never forget the day he told me that he was joining the Army. I honestly thought he could never surprise me as much as he surprised me that day. Well he did it again. I just hope he is ready for marriage. I got married so young myself and it looks like he is following in his mothers footsteps. My first marriage unfortunately didn't work out. I truly didn't know who I was at 18/19 years of age. It's funny you know how they say history repeats itself. Well it happened!

I love you Brendan and I wish you and Susan the absolute best life. Be kind to each other and be each others best friend's. Don't forget to tell her everyday how much you love her and hug her each day. Always pick up after yourself and continue to open doors for her even now that you are married. Buy her flowers on those off day's. Not just on your anniversary or birthday. Women just want the simple things deep down. We don't want things, we just want love and respect. If you respect her she will do the same to you. Remember kindness, love and patients is a wonderful thing. Always be a giver and not a taker. You'll see it will come back to you twofold. The family unit is such an important thing. You are starting your own family now and you both have alot of responsibility coming in the future. Like paying bills, working, and eventually raising a family. Real life can be hard at times. Don't forget to pray when times get tough. Prayer can be a powerful thing. I love you both and wish you many many wonderful years together and the most happy life. Mom


Designs by CK said...

WOW I am shocked too!

I can tell you are a great Mom just like mine!!!

What a lovely sentiment in the ending of the post & SO TRUE!!!

When you give it always comes Mom taught me that too! '-)

Hang in there Kim!

Chris :)

Kim Hardt Originals said...

Thanks Chris! I am still in shock even a day later. I didn't sleep much thinking about the whole thing. Oh well it's over and done now. Can't change it.

Thanks for your kind words. You are truly a great friend.

~dani~ said...

Wow, that is a shocker. I too would be so sad to miss out but am tickled that he called basically right after it happened to share his good news. This is all part of his path and you are just now along for the ride Mom. Sooo hard as we spend sooo much time giving them everything we can give and then suddenly we are no longer as relevant as we once were.

I am impressed with your ability to share such a wonderful sentiment/words of wisdom with Brendan and your new daughter ;) May his need to shock (I have one of these too)not carry into his marriage too long. B/c us girls find it fun and exciting in the early years but in the long run we want stability, trust and respect.

God Bless them and hey...we may be calling you Grandma in a few years? Sorry, you have had enough shock but I just had to go there.
Btw..I see you more as a Mom-Mom than a Granny! You are too young and cute to be a Granny, Grammy, Grandma. ;) xoxo's love~

Kim Hardt Originals said...

Hey Dani, Thanks so much for cheering me up! I needed that! It's always nice to get another parents views on this situation. I just wanted to make sure I hadn't lost my mind. I guess it is time to give up control. I had to give it up to the Army last year. We always want to guide and push our kids in the right direction. They do adventually go up and have to learn on there own. But I know what I went through when I was young and I just pray he thought this through.

Grandma, Gran, Mimi, Momo, Grandy, which shall it be. I don't feel like a grandman yet. Lets hope I wont be one for awhile. Goodness not another shock!

Thanks again Dani!

Jackie said...

Wow....I hope that didn't give you more neck pain :O Your message at the end brought tears to my eyes and you are SOOO right. Have a great night and try to get some sleep tonight :) Jackie

Kim Hardt Originals said...

Hi Jackie, Maybe I had a sick sence about this before it happened and that is why I have been having this neck pain. He He! No all kidding aside, I am happy for them both. I spoke to her yesterday on the phone for a little while. I got a little more info from her than I did from "B". She did tell me that she will have a big wedding in the future. That made me feel much better. Maybe when he gets back from his second tour in Iraq. I also asked her if she cares if I call her once in awhile. The sad part is they live so far away and that is the only contact I will have with them. I can't just say lets go out to dinner or come over for dinner and I will makes your guys favorite. I can't say to Susan let go out to lunch and go shopping. She reassured me that she doesn't care if I call. She said that it would be fine. That was good news.

My Dear Brendan letter could of been much longer but I tried to give some advise. Thats what mom's do, Right!

Thanks for your post.

Carolee said...

Big congratulations to your son and his bride as they begin their lives together! I can understand your wanting to be there, but sometimes young love is impulsive.:)

What wonderful and heartfelt advice you gave him....

~ Carolee

vintagepaletteart said...

Oh {{{{{Kim}}}}}! My nephew did the same thing to my sister, only he was in the Navy and stationed in San Diego, CA.

Almost 9 years and two adorable grandbabies later, they are still together......=o)

Weddings are so expensive and take so long to plan......I'm sure that they had that in the back of their minds too. You could always have a nice reception for them sometime in the future and still get to celebrate their special day. =o)

But I understand how you must feel............big HUGS to you Kim!


Kristen Beason Designs said...

Hey Kim~
What a shocker! I totally agree with Carolee and Lori. Young love is impulsive and you can always have a nice reception in the future. I know it would have been nice to be there to witness your first born getting married. Try not to fret too much about it since you're already trying to get better from the neck pain. Stress will not help that! Take care of yourself & congrats on Brendan marrying a lovely girl. She's lucky to have a wonderful mother-in-law.

Laurie Hardin said...

Young love is impulsive and I remembering wanting to elope instead of having the wedding and my mother was furious...we had the wedding!!! I thought the offer to elope and take the money the wedding was going to cost as "start up" money for us was a great idea. Young and impulsive, Carolee had it right!! Glad to hear you are better a few days after your shock.

Jenn said...

Kim, your message to your son and new daughter in law is just PERFECT and sooo sweet. What a wonderful Mom you are:):) Hopefully you guys can all get together as a family for another ceremony or reception!! I know how worried you must be. Probably not helping the neck issues, huh!!??

Hang in there and take care of yourself!! xoxox

Iva's Creations said...

That would be quite a shocker! But what an understanding and loving mom you are. Such sweet advice too. Life can be so wonderful and then so hard. Your letter will serve them well as they begin their new lives together. Thinking about you...Iva

Krissysart said...

I can't believe you have a 21 year old! My girls are still so young. I always wonder what I am in for. I guess we just have to trust ourselves, God and pray that our children make wise choices. Sounds like he's got a good head on his shoulders.
It's hard not to worry, I know. Keep looking up, my friend. And you can always come to your blogger pals for encouragement and a place to 'vent'!
Krissy said...

I have to admit...I was one of the kids who did that to my own mom! It just worked out so much better for us. 9 years and still going. Congratulations on the new family member!

Kim Hardt Originals said...

Thanks again for all your well wishes and inspirational posts girls. The shock has worn off. Now the reality. They still don't live together yet. He is working on finding a place for them to live. They want to live off base. As soon as they get settled I am making a trip to the Carolina's and giving them both big hugs.